


The Real Thing

by pluto



Category: Mass Effect
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-05-17
Updated: 2012-05-17
Packaged: 2017-11-05 12:26:47
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,518
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/406389
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/pluto/pseuds/pluto
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Garrus is Up To Something.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Real Thing

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks so much to Dee for letting me bounce this story off of her and suggesting some awesome tweaks. Remaining mistakes are mine alone.

If Garrus hadn't jumped when Shepard walked into the Main Battery, she would have never have noticed anything amiss. As it was, her curiosity was piqued when she saw him hurriedly shut off his terminal. 

"Finished with your calibrations?" she asked, raising an eyebrow. 

Garrus did not quite meet her eyes. "Ah... um. Yes." He shifted his weight. 

Shepard leaned up against the console next to him, crossing her arms over her chest and smothering a grin. It was unfair of her to be so amused by his awkwardness, but he was so damn smooth most of the time. She reached across the console. 

"Can I have a look?" 

He caught her wrist before she could touch the controls. If he hadn't been turian, she was sure she would have finally seen him blush. And then he pressed her fingers to his mouth, mandibles brushing the edges of her fingertips. His skin was hot, his breath warm. Her own skin flushed in response. 

Shepard decided to let him off easy.

"Nice move, Vakarian," she murmured, drawing him in close. He laughed, and she left her questions behind, for a little while. 

#

Shepard didn't think of his strange behavior again until she almost collided with Joker coming out of the elevator onto the Crew Deck. His omnitool was open, and she heard a girlish giggle and a breathy moan before he hastily shut down the display. 

"Sorry, Commander, I was just--."

She held up both hands. "Don't tell me."

"It was nothing bad, I swear. Not this time, anyway." He smirked. "Just transferring a few files to Garrus."

Surprised, she turned to see Garrus was standing to one side of the elevator, looking slightly chagrined, if she was getting any better at reading turian expressions. She frowned.

"You two couldn't take it to one of the lounges? Or at least a table by the mess?" 

Joker shrugged. "Well, I was just leaving Dr. Chakwas, and we ran into each other, and got to talking, and Garrus asked me if I had the latest--"

"--Ship schematics," Garrus said. "Just wanted to verify a few structural things before I reconfigured the Thanix cannon."

Shepard watched Joker's face: surprise, puzzlement, then amusement. She was stuck on puzzlement herself. If he and Garrus were trading vids, or heck, even Fornax, she didn't understand why Garrus would hide it from her. 

She debated saying something, and then let it go with a sigh. Whatever it was, it was probably harmless.

"Fine. Carry on." 

She couldn't help glancing back as she walked away; but she couldn't see anything, and went on to Liara's office instead. 

#

Shepard wasn't actually _suspicious_ until she spoke to Vega in the cargo bay. 

Vega was immersed in what looked like work when she came up to him, but when she tapped him on the shoulder, he jumped a mile. The stack of datapads on his worktable went clattering to the floor. 

"What is going on with everyone?" she asked. Her earlier pleasant mood gave way to annoyance.

Vega just laughed, looking embarrassed, and bent to pick the pads up. "Hey. Sorry. Just digging through my stuff. For Scars."

She frowned slightly. "For Garrus?"

"Yeah, you know."

She arched an eyebrow. "No…"

"Oh. Uhm, well, maybe I shouldn't have said anything."

She arched both her eyebrows.

"Well, you know. It's just, he's been through all of Joker's--"

Shepard sighed. "None of my business. Just tell me if it's something I should be worried about."

Vega seemed to seriously consider this for a moment. "Nah. Doubt it." 

She narrowed her eyes, feeling her normal confidence begin to wobble. "You're not exactly being reassuring here."

He snorted. "It's just vids, boss. No big."

"He's been through _all_ of Joker's vids?" She contemplated the sheer magnitude of such a project and began to wonder just what Garrus was calibrating in the battery room. 

Vega looked her up and down. Amusement played over his wide mouth. "Why? Not feeling a bit threatened, are we, oh Mighty Commander Shepard?"

"Ha," she said. "As if."

"Yeah, I mean, why watch so many vids when you've got the real thing, right?" 

Hearing Vega speak her growing, secret fear aloud was like a punch to Shepard's gut. Fortunately, dealing with so many diplomats and politicians had improved her poker face drastically. "Right." She pushed a smile onto her lips. "I should go." 

Vega waved cheerily.

#

Shepard drummed her fingers against her thigh as she rode up in the elevator. What did it matter if Garrus wanted to lose himself in sex vids? The war was ugly, and verging on hopeless, and they both had enough misery on their minds. It was hard to get a moment together; their downtime rarely lined up. Their little excursion up to the Presidium had been a rare luxury. Hell, if she had the time, she wouldn't mind spending it with a dirty vid or two.

There were plenty of bigger things to worry about. 

She breathed out and pushed her thoughts away. She just needed to sleep, wake up with a clear head, and clearer priorities, instead of worrying about--

The elevator doors opened. 

"Garrus!" 

"Hey, Shepard." He was dressed down, in a new outfit. She wondered when he'd bought it. He adjusted the collar self-consciously. "I thought, maybe, we could, ah. Do a little cross-species liaising."

She crossed her arms. The thought was appealing enough, but she couldn't entirely smother her private insecurities. _Ran out of vids?_ came and went, unspoken. 

"I don't know. Liara ordered me to get some sleep."

Garrus looked caught off guard for a moment. "I promise this won't take much of your time."

Shepard couldn't help her smirk, arching an eyebrow. "I'm not sure selling yourself short is the best way to get a lady to 'liaise' with you."

Garrus chuckled. He adjusted his collar again, and she realized he was nervous. Regretting her hasty assumptions, she slipped her hand into his. 

"All right," she said. She smiled at him. "Maybe this will help me relax."

He gestured towards the cabin doors. 

Shepard gasped a little as the doors opened for her. Inside her cabin, the lights were dim, soft music was playing, and there were two glasses of wine sitting on her desk. A huge bouquet of roses--synthetic or real, she couldn't be sure--sat on her nighttable. More were scattered over her bedspread. 

"...Garrus, what is going on here?"

Garrus laughed, awkwardly. "All right… Maybe I got a little carried away. I've been doing a lot of research. Watching a lot of vids."

She nodded. "I've heard." 

Garrus picked one wine glass up, and handed her the other. She couldn't help but feel slightly wary. She had never been much of a wine-and-roses romantic. Maybe just a wine romantic. 

Shepard turned the glass around in her hands. 

"I…" He cleared his throat, and raised his glass. "Shepard. Remember when we were up on the Presidium?"

She smiled. "One of the best days I've had in a long time."

"I asked you if you'd be a one-turian woman. And you said yes."

She nodded. 

"So I… I just wanted to return the favor. To say it out loud." He took a deep breath. "Just want you to know, Shepard. I'm a one-human turian. A one-anything turian. Always have been, always will be. Anyway--" 

She blinked, startled. He clinked his glass against hers and drank deeply. She sipped at hers as he turned, and rummaged under her desk. When he stood, he had a shiny new Black Widow in both hands. 

"I couldn't find a ring. And I thought you'd get more use out of this, anyway." 

Her eyes widened. "Garrus, are you...?"

He looked around himself awkwardly. "Oh. Damn. I'm not doing this right, am I? I-- Right." He dropped down onto one knee. 

Shepard finally managed to pick her jaw up off the floor. "Garrus…"

Garrus laughed, awkwardly. "Don't tell me. I've --." He started to stand. 

She took the Widow. A slow smile spread over her face. "Yes," she said. "I do."

"Yes? I--." He blinked, then flared his mandibles. "Oh. Riiight. I. Good. I mean. I do, too. I-- That's how it goes, right, I mean, in the vids…?" 

She silenced him with a kiss. 

#

Later, sprawled out on her couch, her head on his shoulder, she said, "So, I don't know if I should even ask, but exactly what vids were you watching?"

Garrus laughed. "Want to see one?" 

She hesitated. He queued one up on his omni-tool. After it played for a few minutes, she burst out laughing. "I thought--. Romantic comedies? This whole time? They weren't, uh, you know, porn vids?" 

Garrus shrugged. "I watched a few of those too. But these were the best. The most… educational."

She slid an arm around his shoulders and kissed his mandible. "Clearly, I need to do more research on turians." 

"We don't have romantic comedies. Although, maybe after this war is over..."

Shepard laughed. "Who needs vids?" She leaned him back into the couch. "Hell, I've got the real thing right here."


End file.
